PARENTS AND CHILDREN

During the Wednesday class there was a good discussion on the point Linwood made about Christian parents and their relationship with their children. A large number of children today talk back, are disobedient, or just ignore their parents. In addition, they display this behavior toward other adults: teachers, police officers, and adults in general. What has happened? What is the problem?

Let me first say this is not a new problem. Parents have had to deal with this problem for centuries. Adam and Eve had their problems with Cain. Eli and Samuel had sons who did not follow in their fathers’ footsteps. David was in fear of his life from his son, Absalom. I am not making excuses; I am just saying we are not the first generation of parents to struggle with this situation. Now, I would like to suggest three groups I believe have contributed to the current problem.

Parents. “And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart.7 You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up” (Deuteronomy 6:6-7). “And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4). Upon whom does God place the primary responsibility or training children? The parents are given this task, not the church, not the schools, not the day care industry, and certainly not the entertainment industry. We need to take our responsibilities as parents seriously. We need to teach and instruct our children properly. This needs to be done by word, but also by example. If we tell our children not to be rude to others, and they see us being rude, what have we taught them? Other organizations, including the church, can play a support role, but parents have the primary responsibility.

The church. I am concerned about the role the church is playing today in this matter. We need to be teaching our young people the importance of serving God. A part of this service is their responsibility to honor and obey their parents. I am not opposed to having fun and planning activities to entertain our youth, but these cannot be the focus of a successful youth program. We need to make sure we are placing supreme importance on teaching God’s word.

Society. I believe we would all agree that society has changed in recent years in regard to this situation. When I was growing up, parents did not hesitate to discipline their children (spanking), even in public. Now, if you do such, you are subject to public disapproval and possibly even being reported to authorities. It is shameful that we live in a society where child abuse is such a problem, but spanking a child is not abuse. In fact, a lack of discipline is abuse. “He who spares his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him promptly” (Proverbs 13:24). We must be willing to do what is right, even if it means public disapproval.

Proverbs 22:6 – “Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.”
--Lamar